My first pregnancy | A story of my life

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In the last five years I experienced three pregnancies and two live births. I was in a constant hormonal pregnant mode for the entire twelve months due to the miscarriage. Although it was a whole lot, I can now confidently say that the first pregnancy, the first birth, and the first baby is the most humble, unknown, and majestic experience. It is the experience that will surprise you at every step, amaze you at every stage and will have an impact on your life forever.

It was the 14^th of February when I sent him a text message that we are expecting a baby whilst returning back home from the hospital in Buenos Aires.

Back then we had so many plans and ideas about what we wanted to do with our lives. I was at the peak of my career, all doors were opened for me.

And then two burgundy lines appeared on a pregnancy test. These were not light pinkish lines, they were very red and as it turned out – very real.

Two weeks later, on March 31 at 9:30, we went for an ultrasound. I remember all I was worried about at that moment was whether I was really pregnant. I still couldn’t fully believe what was happening, because besides a couple of tests and the absence of menstruation, I had no other proof of actual pregnancy. I lay down, the obstetrician spat out the gel from the tube directly onto my lower abdomen, and raised the device above her head. I screamed in Spanish: “Well, is there anything there, is there?” San stood right in front of me, leaning against the computer.

Since I couldn’t see anything, I simply kept jabbering the same question, carefully thinking through action plans and explanations for Santi and all his relatives in the event of a negative result. The obstetrician said, smiling, “Yes, there is actually SOMEONE there, look for yourself.” I exhaled. I was happy. We were pregnant. It was our Plum (this is what we called our baby throughout the pregnancy) with a very large head, a completely disproportionate body and twisted dinosaur-like future arms and legs. That same day, late at night, San flew to Prague. And I was left alone with my future baby in Buenos Aires for the next three months.

First trimester in pregnancies

I must say that except for constantly being worried about my well-being, my pregnancy was going as perfectly well as possible. In my opinion, pregnancy means a countless amount of patience. Furthermore, pregnancy always leads to the unknown: it is impossible to expect something that you have never experienced and you don’t know what exactly to expect. Therefore, I was incredibly challenged as I am generally lost when there is no plan and lots of patience.

My pregnancy undoubtedly was perfect. I didn’t know what morning sickness was. Only once I got sick due to the intake of some vitamins. I was so scared that I couldn’t understand where to put myself. Now I know that it is a daily routine for some women. To this day, all those women who go through this every morning remain a mystery to me.

Instead, I got into a hibernated mode throughout my entire first trimester. I literally used to sleet through the night, wake up in the morning to send my husband to work and happily return to bed. I then used to sleep until around 8 pm, make dinner, meet my husband from work and we used to go to sleep after a movie.

Cravings? Oh, I ate the most delicious juicy Argentine oranges and tangerines every day. Santiago used to bring kilos of tangerines and they were all mine.

If I compare my first pregnancy with the second, then in the first instance, every change seemed so intense, so clear, so fascinating for me. I used to capture the roundness of the lower abdomen weekly. I became calmer, harmonious, and finally I began to enjoy my pregnancy.

Pregnancy Tracker Apps

Every day I expected something new. We both had an app downloaded on our phones that showed us weekly videos of foetal development. Visually, I imagined how everything was happening, but to tell the truth, it didn’t feel the way it feels now: when you see your baby, hold him, and realize that this miracle has come such a long and incredibly difficult way. Subsequently, I made a book describing each week of Teo’s development and what he got up to in the last months of pregnancy. Each week was designated by a specific fruit or vegetable, symbolizing the approximate size of our Teo Benjamin.

Second trimester in pregnancies

We decided that Santiago would go to Prague first and settle down. On the contrary, I would finish my work at the university of San Martin, wait for the safer second trimester to fly, and then meet him in Europe. In reality, it was hard. What exactly? Everything!

I enjoyed the first month (week 12) being alone with the baby. I devoted myself to work 52 hours a week, and so days passed quickly and easily. However, the second month made me go off track, not to mention the third. Many women become irritable during pregnancy, after childbirth, or during breastfeeding. I became an utter cry-baby, and the further the more. The second month seemed like torture, I was exhausted, crazy thoughts kept popping into my mind. But most importantly, I realized how important it is to have a man beside you during the pregnancy process.

During my 16th week, I felt the Plum for the first time. I called that feeling “The Touch of Hands”, aka the flapping of a butterfly’s wings. It was so lightning fast that I was not sure if that was true or I just imagined the feeling. I soon learnt that our Plum loves to communicate.

A week later, I felt another touch like the flutter of a feather. And I knew it was the Plum. After another four-five days, around week 18, we began to communicate on a different level. The sensations grew, and the effect of “The Touch of Hands” very soon turned into certain strokes and subsequently into pushes.

Week 18 was incredibly important because we found out the gender of the baby. Working a huge number of hours, I began to get more tired, which resulted in numbness of my belly and difficulty to move. So, I decided to get checked. Every check consists of an ultrasound, a urine test and a general health check. At that time, we were communicating with Plum a lot. He was such a fidget. This showed well on a scan when three midwives were failing to calm him down and see Plum’s gender.

Finally, they agreed on a boy. The Plum converted into Teo Benjamin.

Sickness during pregnancies

I kept working, preparing necessary documents, selling all the furniture and slowly packing. Until one day I got sick. There is nothing worse in a pregnancy than getting sick. In addition to the flu, I got UTI. Such a mix resulted in me wishing to die. I was vomiting, had headaches, and a runny nose; my entire body was in dreadful pain. I could not sleep at night. Besides I had only one week left before taking a long-haul flight alone.

We overcame this obstacle. The day to take a flight had come. I was equally sad to leave Argentina where our family was but also excited to see Santi again.

My belly was already noticeable. I was half way through.

Long-haul flights during pregnancies

Flight. Oh well, that was nothing more but scary. I managed 35 hours of travel with two transfers. I think I have taken plenty of flights so far but this was remarkable and in its way, unforgettable. Spoiler: with my second baby, I also had to take a flight at the same stage of pregnancy but it was for work (which was not easy) and this time I flew business class.

However, first pregnancies remain first. I was alone flying in such an interesting condition. Of course, I read a lot. And there was so much hesitation. Lots of people say it is unsafe to fly, that it is even dangerous. Then you read about all the side effects and things that happen to you while you are up in the air. This is not an easy decision when you are first-time pregnant.

In general, every pregnancy is a very individual process. It also I think depends a lot on the personality and temperament of the woman, her well-being, cultural background, and the environment that surrounds her. After giving birth, I realized that everything was laid down by nature itself, it was designed in such a way that my baby already knew everything. He was in an amazing survival mode and managed to live. Its preservation is the most important achievement of civilization. For instance, look at the breast milk production which on its own is a complete miracle. Nothing can change its content so quickly, but breast milk can do this only in one feeding, e.g. when the baby or mom are sick.

Returning to pregnancy, now I think that the second time I will definitely remove the anxiety about my condition and will be able to enjoy the process even more.

Spoiler: I actually did enjoy every second of my second pregnancy. By all means it is an absolutely different experience, but so worth it. It is indeed a very special and unique moment of my life.

So, the flight.

The entire way from Buenos Aires to Rio de Janeiro resulted in quite severe storms with turbulence. The journey was long. Good news: my water supplies never ended. For the first time I was rewarded with litres of water, and spent almost the entire journey on my feet stretching.

Finally, the first flight went well and we safely landed in Istanbul. The only downside was that we still had a long way to go. Upon arrival in Istanbul, we had already spent about 18 hours on the journey. My belly started to get harder and I started to feel some pain. An excellent solution was to spend the night in Istanbul with a long layover; I was offered a transfer to a 4-star hotel with breakfast. I needed a hot shower, food, Wi-Fi and a super comfy bed. By the time I plopped down on it, it was already difficult for me to move, so it’s hard to imagine how I would have survived everything, standing at the airport and waiting for the next flight.

After a long time of trying to persuade myself to fall asleep, I finally achieved my goal. Delicious breakfast with tea and car waiting outside the hotel. I was travelling to the airport in a minibus completely alone. The driver moved me to the passenger seat and gave me a little city tour.

I boarded a tiny airplane, my stomach was pressed against the seat in front of us. It took just an hour and a half to reach my final destination and meet with my beloved. I exhaled. We were almost landing when the plane suddenly took off, causing noise and groaning in the cabin. “Wow!”, I thought, “do they even know that a pregnant woman is on board?!” They’ve gone completely crazy there!” The light came on: “Dear ladies and gentlemen, this is the captain speaking.” Brilliant! It turned out that someone had landed earlier, and we had to wait our turn. This was the reason why we had to sharply raise the altitude, make a circle and land again.

After all, I’d say although flying when you are pregnant may seem scary and confusing, I loved it both times. Regardless of the whole adventure that I got into, I felt very well after all the flights I took as a pregnant lady.

My life as an European expat has begun.

Prenatal Yoga

A week after my arrival, I went to my first class of prenatal yoga. To tell the truth, it was my dream to try this type of yoga. Turns out, this type of yoga is a huge support during pregnancy. Its most important principle was the effect on certain parts of the body and organs in order to help the baby and mother feel light and comfortable, namely relaxation of the vena cava, strengthening the pelvic floor and female organs, opening the chest and much more.

Prenatal yoga was a huge booster and support for me. It made my stay in Prague unforgettable. I made friends a week after arrival, I had fun spending some time socializing, learning about the country, culture, traditions and preparing for my future status as a mom.

Last weeks of the second trimester. The most interesting starts to begin

Finally, we got together. It didn’t feel that lonely or unknown. We were in this together. Besides, we reached one of the most beautiful stages in pregnancy – week 21.

Our Plum was now kicking hard. Surprisingly enough, I was the only human being who could feel those strong kicks. Santi had to get used to grasping the moments. But he didn’t feel the same. On the contrary, I was simply amazed at how it was impossible to see or feel something that is coming out.

Only later, after talking to several people, I realized that my feelings and what others feel when they touch my belly are two different things. But this did not stop us. Santi literally disappeared into my belly. It is a known fact that for men the process of fatherhood is very different from motherhood.

My man is one complete exception. A person who does not say three cherished words, or does not consider it necessary to give a bouquet of flowers, or even a birthday present; For him, non-verbal communication is more important, his three cherished words are more likely to be expressed in incredible care and hugs, and the classical traditions of this world will develop into small pleasant surprises. Seemingly not an emotional person, he used to hang on my belly. Subsequently, this led to these beautiful moments when my husband used to return from work, Plum immediately used to start kicking.

Plum used to always kick. I remember I came for a routine check-up and told the doctor that most likely my baby was hyperactive, simply because he wouldn’t stop kicking. The doctor told me that it was great luck and luxury to feel your baby so often. In the meantime, dad and Plum had their own game of communication. Sometimes their conversations lasted for two hours. When Plum was apparently tired, dad used to say: “Bye, I am leaving”, and Plum used to move again.

Second half of the second trimester is fun because it is all about communication with your baby. Besides, it’s the time when the belly is not as big and heavy, and physically you are very active as a woman. This is the most magical time.

Plum used to react to a flashlight from the phone, and he used to recognize certain sounds. We could tell when something scared him. Yet, in some miraculous way, the baby could recognize dad’s invitation to play or mom’s warm hug asking to calm down and relax.

Above all, our baby was unique. Normally babies sleep during mom’s high activity. Our Plum did the opposite. Every time I visited the sauna, swam in the lake or pool, went for walks, he preferred to live an active lifestyle, and there was no rest from his movements and kicking. However, when I was sleeping, he was sleeping too.

By the way, when Teo was born he was the same. He is still a fantastic sleeper and super active boy.

Third trimester in pregnancies

Third trimester is when you get bigger, heavier, and more tired.

Although I say my pregnancy was going perfect, I had one tiny issue called hypertonicity of the uterus. My belly used to get rock solid after a few hours of walking, which meant I should have stopped and rest. Sometimes, it worked, but most of the time, it meant I should go home.

It is a shame because even if you feel lots of energy, the hypertonicity prevents you from movement.

One thing that helped me a lot was a sling or baby carrier. Slings are not only for carrying a baby, they are also the best for carrying your belly. I used to wrap it the way it supported my belly and reduced the overall pressure.

Hypertonicity also prevented me from exercising. The doctor was very strict to me, ordering to stop any physical activity until I gave birth as it could have provoked preterm labour. The solution was to rest a lot and intake Magnesium.

Furthermore, the third trimester is when you get tired much quicker and sleepy. This is why I never could meet Santi’s friends. By the time they finished their work and went out, I was absolutely knackered sleeping on my comfy bed at home.

However, nothing stopped me from travelling! I was so excited to see my sister. So, when she arrived, we took off on our planned road trip around the Czech Republic.

Two other unique factors of my pregnancy were drinking five liters of pure water per day and visiting the bathroom every hour during the day and three to four times per night.

Oh, I forgot to mention massive heartburn. But I had it only when I used to miss my regular meal time. Plum knew exactly how to communicate this message to me.

My last month of pregnancy was filled with miraculous exciting occasions. It was also the hardest month by far.

• First of all, we got officially married.
• Secondly, we had our pregnancy photoshoot.
• Thirdly, we took an antenatal class.
• And lastly, we bought all the essentials for babies.

Then my in-laws arrived.

That’s not all.

September was the month when my contractions arrived. These were not a few-day contractions before the labour. These were daily routine contractions that used to start every evening at around 9 pm. I guess this is my unique way to prepare for the labour. It needs some time (more than usual) but then also it eases the process of the labour.

These constant contractions were boring and gave me nothing but lumbar pain as well as sleepless nights.

Last month: how to prepare for the labour

So, it was September. I was incredibly happy that we took the antenatal classes. I learned a lot of interesting facts.

For instance, before passing through the mother’s pelvis, the baby first tries on his head well in order to fit through in the best possible way. I quickly realized why in the last two weeks both sides of my pelvis hurt so much. It felt as if I had bruises there, which made it even more difficult to sleep.

Another interesting fact is that when a baby is passing through the pelvis, they rotate, like a wine cork. Then in the birth canal, when going through the last stage, they float on their own. In this instance, mom doesn’t push. It wouldn’t help regardless. They simply move with the flow, diligently looking for a way out.

It was very important for me to understand the process of giving birth to a baby, because at that moment I clearly realized that it was not about me at all. It was all about him. I had to do everything necessary to help him. Though my husband’s task was to help me. And he did it in the best possible way.

To Be Continued…

Giving Birth: Labour & Delivery For The First Time | A Story of My Life

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